Life as a DJ’s girlfriend… Promoting his music. & His name popping up on my playlist screen, is pretty damn cool. Go check him out on soundcloud. (:
What drives me crazy is that I’m sooo sooooooo organized. That’s just who I am, my life cannot function properly without order in my life. I’m the type of person who looks into the future and plans on how to secure myself money wise, I keep budgets, I keep my room clean, I keep planners to remind me, whiteboard with schedules, alarms to wake me up. I work extra hard on something I want, and won’t stop till its how I want it to be. I go after everything I want.
My boyfriend on the other hand is the absolute opposite of me. Never thinks ahead of time, doesn’t make a decision till the last second, dosent think of how to spend his money, he dosent plan, he dosent write things down, he let’s things go with the flow and hopes for the best.
I really don’t care how he lives his life, but him not thinking ahead or not trying so hard to get a better job, or whatever, absolutely drives me insane. His life is part of my life, and the disorganization is so frustrating, because I know he could be doing so much better, money wise, career wise just if he gave that extra effort or looked a little into the future to see how doing something could better it.
He is the one part of my life that I cannot live without, but he is also the part of my life, why I feel like going insane. Still. Wouldn’t trade him for the world.
Letter to you.
I don’t think either one of us knew what we were getting into. But really… Risking a heartbreak seemed worth it.
We spent most of our days fighting about traffic laws and flirting like 12 year olds. Running red lights, forgetting curfew, and always sneaking in that last goodbye kiss.
We talked about life, we risked getting sick just to be there when one of us was, we did everything we could just to help one another out.
Of course, there was that little bickering, but right after we always let it go, and joked about something else. Nothing was worth it, to make us miss a moment that we couldnt spend laughing together.
We talked about the past, but kept an eye on our future. We were growing up, but not apart. I don’t know if we’re perfect for each other, but being perfect for each other isn’t nesissarly key to a relationship. It’s looking beyond the relationship, it’s remembering the times you wanted to give up, but realizing losing your best friend isn’t worth an argument you can’t fix, or a situation you can’t compromise on. It’s when you don’t have to worry or second guess their feelings, because you don’t doubt them. It’s when you know they care, without needing reassurance.
We spent this year trying to figure out what we wanted out of life, but never forgetting who’s by our side. We really didn’t have much, but we had each other.
My love.
Had a sleepover with Seth last night, i forgot how much I missed laying there and knowing his right next to me. Watching movies, and staying up and talking. Then falling asleep, with me wrapped in his arms. even though, he literally sleeps on my head by the middle of the night, but this time, he put a pillow on my head to make it more comfortable. I’m lucky I didn’t get smothered to death. Hahaha, that’s usually how it goes with that fool. But, in all seriousness, I absolutely love waking up next to him, and him reaching over to pull me in closer to him. I feel so safe and secure with him, I forget all my problems, and I’m just happy to be with him. It’s such a stress reliever to have him with me, and with the mess of both our lives, it’s those moments that we forget, we may not have a dollar to our name or that we may be struggling to just get through the day, we remember we have each other. We may be a mess, but life is so perfect when your with the person you love the most, no matter if it’s just a short hug in the hallway from a crush or someone that will hold you all night.
At work today, I was handing a woman her receipt, and she took my hand to look at my ring. She said it was so beautiful, and I told her my boyfriend got it for me, and she told me that he’s got a beautiful girlfriend, and he has great taste in picking out rings. Yep. It was a day maker. (:
Love & Growing up.
We’re growing up, not apart. We’re receiving responsibility for something other than ourselves. Were facing the struggles of life. As busy and consumed we are with life, we have each other. We have Saturday nights. We have the outskirts of town, we have gas in our truck, and we have all the love two eighteen year olds know.
We left high school, but took each other. We left the drama, but took all the memories. We use to drive home, in silence, because we were scared to say something stupid, now we sit and talk for hours on end with the windows down and radio on, back in the fields near your house. You would stay at my house till 2 in the morning, when I got sick. Scrubbed out, in oversized shirts and flannel shorts, no make up and my glasses on. All we did was watch movies, till I fell asleep. You kissed my forehead, and brought me to my bed. We would go to the old pumphouse on those hot summer days, and swim. You take me out on dates, and would drive around, no where to go, until I made up my mind of where I wanted to eat. We would go to movie night at my church and fight for the last pillow. I came to your house, after your car accident and brought you your favorite drink, to make you feel better. I drove you to job interviews and work, after your car got totaled, and helped you whenever you got into a bad situation. We would hang out with each others friends, and remember that one time, I grabbed your best friends hand, thinking it was yours. Everytime you made me mad, you would wrap my your arms around me, and say “It dosent matter, because I love you.” We went through difficult times, and situations that tested our relationship. I went to a party without you and someone forced there lips to mine. You got mad because all I did was push him away. I know it hurt you, but I couldn’t hide something like that from you. We didn’t just sit and let the little things bug us, we tell each other everything, weather we liked it or not. & there was time where we just wanted to give up, but everytime there was something that told up to never give up.
We most definitely aren’t the most perfect couple, and sometimes I feel like we aren’t perfect for each other, but who really is? You will never find a perfect person, or the perfect relationship, but you will find someone that accepts your imperfections and never gives up. Love isn’t perfect, but it’s something worth fighting for.
